at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
