I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Randomize
