my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
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