see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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