Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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