it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
