I feel like I'm in dance class right now
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
