White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
