some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize