Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
What drink are we having for lunch?
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
