god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
