He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Dignity is for republicans.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize
