Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Randomize
