Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Boobs speak an international language.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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