we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
and you fell through a lawn chair
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
