Soap is not a condiment
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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