oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize
