AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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