well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize