my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Do you still have your period?
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Randomize
