check it out our google latitudes are spooning
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
