You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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