i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize