oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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