you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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