i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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