Swine flu. Run for my life!
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
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