OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
