she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
