can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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