Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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