physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
