all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
Randomize