I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
be right there i have to get my cape
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize