So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
