Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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