She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize
