i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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