She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
