cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
We got so high we made milksteak
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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