Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
