Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
