How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
