i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I feel like death gave me a hand job
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
