He is such a slut. More and more my type.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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