He kissed a someone with a penis
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
