Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
