why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Your penis caused this!
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