Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
