me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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