good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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